No, Virginia, Obama cannot take your guns

Killing in the name of … And now you do what they told you.

— Rage Against the Machine

A few random thoughts while waiting for the next Honey Boo Boo installment:

— I don’t doubt the so-called Rev. Terry Jones and his obviously simple-minded followers are smugly surveying what they wrought with their sickening anti-Islamic movie “Innocence of Muslims” and are reveling in the attention that is swirling around them. The fact that four Americans, including Ambassador Chris Stevens, and several others protesting the movie are dead now? Them’s the breaks.

I read a recent report that said while Americans are as deeply rooted in their predominantly Judeo-Christian faith as they’ve ever been, fewer and fewer of them are attending churches these days, choosing instead to celebrate their spirituality in the privacy of their own homes. With intolerable freak shows like Jones spouting hatred from the pulpit and the soul-less ghouls from Westboro Baptist Church spreading their own sickening brand of “religion” all over the country, it’s easy to understand why.

— This is going to come as a surprise to a whole lot of people: Despite what the latest ultra-right-wing posts assure you is happening even now as you’re reading this, President Obama and the United Nations are not putting the finishing touches on their nefarious plot to “take away our guns.” No man — not even the president of the United States — has that kind of power even if he were so inclined. To spread such ludicrous propaganda to some highly impressionable — and not very well-informed — folks who obviously can’t parse truth from fiction is nothing more than another salvo in the effort to remove Obama from office.

After all, what kind of world would this be if we didn’t hold onto our sacred, God-given (I think it’s in Leviticus somewhere) right to carry semi-automatic weapons? Safer, you say? Let’s not go there.

— Judging from the somber looks on the faces of Albany and Dougherty County officials — and their refusal to share words of wisdom with their media pals — as they left the first joint local-option sales tax mediation session Monday morning, I’d say things didn’t go so well in the effort to decide on an equitable split of the 1 percent tax money. The city is currently getting 60 percent of those funds and wants more. The county says anything less than its current 40 percent would be budget-busting disastrous.

Each percentage point is worth roughly $175,000, so this is no petty gripe. Some with a high level of involvement in the squabble say there is not likely to be an agreement, meaning a Superior Court judge will determine the split.

— In the wake of the apparent pending dismissal of Albany Police Department Cpl. Gary Price — a quick aside here, umm, guys, what took you so long? — I noticed local law enforcement agencies are sticking to their guns, so to speak, in their insistence that when they buy new patrol vehicles they get the ones with the Mac-daddy souped-up engines. While that’s understandable for officers patrolling highways where speed limits exceed 50 miles per hour, it makes little sense that city police demand these powerful and very costly beasts. If they’re patrolling streets whose speed limits do not exceed 45 mph, why all that “Top Gun” need for speed?

And, while we’re here: Please, please, please, top lawmen, when an officer has as many wrecks as Price did in his career, can’t you find him a safe desk job after the first couple?

— Best line I’ve heard about the huge crowds of true believers snaking their way around the Olive Garden hoping for an opportunity to know true Nirvana by enjoying some of that establishment’s salad and breadsticks: The Herald’s Jim West had covered the restaurant’s opening day and was telling the newsroom about the crowds. I jokingly said I thought I’d run out there during my 30-minute dinner break and have a leisurely meal. Quipped West: “If you’re going there to pick up dinner, you better pack a lunch.”

OK, so it wasn’t that great. But, for West, not bad.