SCOTT LUDWIG: In defense of defensive driving

When I took driver’s education in high school, I was taught how to drive defensively. In other words, adhering to the philosophy that when you’re behind the wheel of an automobile, you should protect yourself from more than just the other drivers. Anticipating hazards — deer running across the road, for example — or slowing down when it’s raining.

But the more I’m on the roads these days, I’m reminded that the first axiom of defensive driving — protecting yourself from other drivers — is now more important than ever. Why do I say that? Well, let me just say that it wouldn’t take much to convince me that what they teach in high schools these days isn’t defensive driving. Offensive driving, however, I would believe.

What that means to someone like me is this: caveat exactorus.

Driver beware.

For those of you who were never made to watch those black and white films showing horrific automobile accidents to get your attention, here are the most valuable things I took from my high school defensive driving course. My instructor was the unforgettable Mr. Magoo:

I’m kidding, of course.

My driver’s ed instructor’s name was actually Mrs. Magoo. That’s because, well, she was in fact a woman.

· Allow one car length between you and the car in front of you for every 10 miles per hour you are driving. Unfortunately, from what I can tell, this has been simplified over the past couple of decades to just make sure your bumpers don’t touch.

· When you do anything other than drive straight ahead — i.e. change lanes, make a turn — use your turn signal. On the cars manufactured now, turn signals appear to be an option, just like heated seats and sunroofs.

· A green light doesn’t mean go. Rather, it means proceed with caution. In my opinion, Mrs. Magoo was way ahead of her time. This is probably not news to anyone on the road these days, but distracted drivers (texting, talking on the phone, screaming at the kids in the back seat) have been known to blow through red lights and stop signs a time or two. If you’re not careful, you might end up with the kind of T-bone you can’t digest.

· The way to navigate a roundabout is using the give gap/take gap method. However, as we all know, every single person on the planet has their own philosophy about roundabouts. So what I do now when I come to a roundabout is wait until there’s not a car in sight before making a move. That way no one gets hurt. Literally.

· If two or more cars arrive at a four-way stop at the exact same time, defer to the car to your right. But what if two cars coming from opposite directions arrive at a four-way stop at the exact same time? Don’t worry about that because, according to Mrs. Magoo, that should never happen. So far so good…

· Never, never, never tailgate. Leave enough space between you and the car in front of you so that you have time to come to a complete stop without any advance notice. For example, the car in front of you may slam on their brakes to avoid hitting a deer. If you’re so close that you can’t bring your car to a stop in time, your hood ornament might just end up in someone else’s back seat.

FYI: I always drive the speed limit.

At night and/or in an area known as a deer crossing, I drive even slower. That being said, if you’re riding my tail on a two-lane road or highway and I begin to slow down, it may not be because I’m trying to avoid hitting a deer. It might be because I’m slowing down to aggravate you.

In fact, I just might have to get a bumper sticker: If you’re close enough to read this, I’m slowing down on purpose.

So you can either back off — or go around.

You might want to get one for yourself.

In closing, please spread the word. Share this with those who need to be enlightened. That means pretty much everyone.

One last thing: Although it wasn’t part of the defensive driving curriculum, there’s one other tidbit I took away from the course: Avoid parallel parking at all costs. That might need a bumper sticker as well.