MOVING THE CHAINS: Pulling a Bobby Petrino

On December 10, 2007, the head coach of the NFL’s Atlanta Falcons left a “Dear John” letter on the locker of every one of his players. It read as follows:

“Out of respect for you, I am letting you know that, with a heavy heart, I resigned today as head coach of the Atlanta Falcons.”

Bobby Petrino, nearing the end of a disastrous (the team record was 3-10 at the time) season, believed the grass — technically, artificial turf — would be greener in Fayetteville, Arkansas, where he planned to return to the college ranks to coach the University of Arkansas football team.

Now, 15 years later and almost to the day, the Falcons’ Marcus Mariota did practically the exact same thing: he abruptly left the team after losing his job as the starting quarterback. It’s probably just a coincidence that it happened after the 13th game of a (losing) regular season, just like Petrino did in 2007.

There’s a word for what Mariotta did to his teammates: desertion. He turned his back on his teammates and, without any remorse or guilt, simply walked away.

Or, putting it another way, he “pulled a Petrino.”

When the going gets tough, leave.

College football has another word for it. Technically, two words: transfer portal.

Now entering its fifth year, the transfer portal allows student-athletes to transfer from one school to another: whenever they like and with no questions asked. And, unless things change, they can do it as often as they like.

You may wonder why a player would want to leave an athletic program at one school for another. There can be any number of reasons. A problem with academics. A desire for more playing time. A craving for a change of scenery.

Or, in short, hoping that the grass — or artificial turf, in some cases — will be greener on the other side.

To hell with team loyalty. Or honoring a scholarship.

It’s been great, coach, but it’s time for me to go. I’m outta here.

Another reason for entering the transfer portal is to follow a coach who takes a job at a new school. Like this year’s Heisman Trophy winner, Caleb Williams, did last season to remain with his coach, Lincoln Riley, who left Oklahoma to take over the football team at $outhern Cal for rea$on$ of his own.

♦ Arguably, it was the best use of the transfer portal to date: by Caleb Williams, by Lincoln Riley and by the University of Southern California. This season the Trojans finished 11-2, their best record since 2008, and competed in the Pac-12 Championship game.

♦ Utah won that game and was crowned Pac-12 Champions.

Incidentally, both of USC’s losses were to Utah.

It’s worth mentioning the comparative statistics of the two opposing quarterbacks in those two games.

Caleb Williams (USC): completed 53 of 83 passes for 744 yards, eight touchdowns and one interception.

Cam Rising (Utah): completed 51 of 77 passes for 725 yards, five touchdowns and no interceptions. He also rushed for three touchdowns.

In head-to-head competition, the Heisman winner arguably wasn’t even the best quarterback on the field.

One of the transfer portal’s “frequent shoppers” is former Florida quarterback Emory Jones. After playing three seasons with the Gators, this year he enrolled at Arizona State, where he started the season as the team’s starting quarterback. He held the position for seven games, then he lost his job. Now, Jones is in the transfer portal for a second time, where he will likely play for his third collegiate team next season, this time as a graduate student.

It’s been great, coach, but it’s time for me to go. I’m outta here.

One of the more surprising players entering the transfer portal is Clemson quarterback D.J. Uiagalelei. Then again, not as surprising when you take into account he was benched in this year’s ACC Championship game against North Carolina.

Incidentally, Uiagalelei was one of the first collegiate players to take advantage of NIL, which allows a player to be paid for the use of their name, image, and likeness. He appeared in a Dr. Pepper commercial at the onset of the 2021 season.

If memory serves, I only saw the commercial once — and I watch a LOT of college football.

Apparently, Dr. Pepper pulled the plug on Uiagalelei’s commercial. Dr. Pepper may have even left a note on his locker telling him so.

According to the NCAA, the transfer portal’s purpose is to “better support the sustainability of college sports.”

Actually, what it’s done is create problems for college football coaches. Now they have to deal with taking in new players — and losing some of their current ones — while trying to assemble a cohesive and competitive football team comprised of impressionable young men.

That’s to say, impressionable young men between the ages of 17 and 22 who can cut and run at any time.

Just like Petrino did with the Atlanta Falcons in 2007.

Regardless of what the NCAA says, that kind of behavior was wrong 15 years ago, and it’s still wrong today.

Sustainability of college sports my a.