CARLTON FLETCHER: To think, it all started with sticks and stones

Send lawyers, guns and money. The sh– has hit the fan.

— Warren Zevon

It started with rocks. And sticks.

Ancient man, in his attempt to find better ways to ward off enemies – human and otherwise – came up with a simple plan to use these readily available materials in an effort to gain an upper hand.

When he realized he was still required to encounter enemies at close quarters, he improved on these primitive weapons. He sharpened the sticks and made them more aerodynamic, better for throwing at enemies. And, eventually, he came up with the brilliant idea to stretch some type of material across a bent staff so that he could shoot sharpened sticks – which became arrows – at opponents from a much safer distance.

Eventually, looking for a way to propel more deadly ammunition at foes from a much greater distance, brilliant craftsmen created the first guns. As the native Americans who fought white settlers in their vanishing homelands soon learned, arrows and even stone and metal sharpened into tomahawks, spears and knives were no match for these “thunder sticks” that brought death and destruction from amazing distances.

Once these rudimentary guns were improved upon and more deadly features added, there was no stopping man in his quest to create the ultimate killing machines. From muskets to repeater rifles to cannons to machine guns to automatic weapons that could shoot thousands of bullets a second, man could not stop improving on the deadly efficiency of his ultimate weapon.

Of course, governments, anxious to add to the kill ratio in the unceasing streams of wars to take native lands or flex regional might, had to get into the act. They put their greatest minds to the task of creating and improving on weapons of mass destruction, adding bombs to their arsenal.

And then, in a heretofore unheard-of attempt to vanquish an enemy and end what had been a costly and deadly World War, America dropped its latest creation — atomic bombs — on cities in Japan, leaving in their wake mind-numbing destruction on a scale never seen.

Of course, the quest to keep finding even more deadly weapons has not abated. This is, after all, mankind we’re talking about. Improved and more dangerous weapon systems have been developed to the point that Russian officials say they now have a nuclear bomb that can be launched anywhere in the world and has the capacity to wipe out entire states in America.

Yes, it started with sticks and stones … and, yes, they could break our bones … but the quest has evolved into an arms race that has evil-minded despots intent on wiping innocent people — children, senior citizens, artists — off the face of the earth.

Some more sensible individuals whisper the words “gun control” now, but they’re written off as “soft” as this gun-crazy country rationalizes that the only way to stop gun crimes is to arm ever more people. “We just have to have more guns than they do.”

That logic may soothe their lust for weaponry, but when the daily escalation of madmen who don’t mind killing innocents to feed their own ego reaches a point where just one of them decides to utilize a nuclear weapon — and, believe me, with the evil world leaders that proliferate today, that moment is only an angry gesture away — I guess the individuals who stocked up on all the weapons they can scrounge can enjoy their purchases as they’re vaporized along with the rest of us.

Email Carlton Fletcher at [email protected].