T. GAMBLE: It’s always some guy’s fault

By now you are probably aware the Academy Awards got screwed up and awarded the wrong movie Best Picture before correcting the mistake.

I did not actually see the event, as I have been boycotting the Oscars since about 1975 when “The Outlaw Josey Wales” did not win the award for Best Picture. I am a trendsetter of sorts, as I understand many other people boycotted this year’s show for other reasons.

Come to think of it, “The Outlaw Josey Wales” did not even get nominated. Man, the injustice of it all.

Prior to that oversight, they also failed to nominate “Dirty Harry.” Clint Eastwood should have sued them both times, but later he did get a nomination for his movie about a female boxer and for “Unforgiven.”

I mean, how can a movie not win that has the main character, Inspector Callahan, ask the completely despicable criminal, who is contemplating reaching for his gun while Harry has his pointed at him, “I know you are wondering what I am wondering, did he shoot five times or six? To tell you the truth, I don’t remember myself. So, punk, you got to ask yourself, do I feel lucky today? Go ahead and make my day.”

Even Shakespeare could not write such touching prose.

But, I am afraid I am too sensitive and sophisticated in my movie tastes to ever expect another of my films to win. This year, the real winner was for the movie “Moonlight.” I have not seen “Moonlight,” nor have most other Americans as it barely made a blip at the box office. So, that makes it perfect to win the award, plus it is about a gay man fighting adversity. It is very hard to win an Oscar against such subject matter competition.

The Academy should have anticipated a potential snafu when they allowed Faye Dunaway and Warren Beatty to present the award. For heaven’s sake, they are celebrating the 50th anniversary of their Oscar-winning movie “Bonnie and Clyde.” They weren’t spring chickens when it came out, either.

When you get their age, it can be tough to read the small print and I’m not sure either one of them could look down because they’ve had so much botox injected they can only look up.

I understand anyway that it may have been the fault of some guy who handed them the wrong envelope. I think he used to work for Steve Harvey.

Of course, there is always some unnamed guy that causes these sort of things. In the criminal law field it is known as “that other dude defense.” I’m not sure what they call it at the Oscars.

Maybe they will have better luck next year. Regardless, I’ll continue my boycott until they award “Saving Private Ryan” and “Rambo” belated Oscars.

Good taste simply cannot be compromised.

Email columnist T. Gamble at [email protected].