SCOTT LUDWIG: Socially acceptable

The social drinker is someone who doesn’t normally partake of alcoholic beverages, but will do so occasionally in various social settings to “fit in.” For example, drinking a glass of champagne to celebrate a birthday or wedding … or popping open a brew or two at a football game with a group of beer-swilling pals. In other words, they’ll make an exception to their rule when the situation calls for doing so.

The concept of the social drinker brought to mind other social adapters who may otherwise have slipped under the radar … had it not been for the fact that they’re being pointed out here.

A few examples, all drawn from real life:

♦ The social deserter — Someone who maintains a sugar-free diet but will disregard their dietary principles to enjoy a piece of cake at a bridal shower (or bachelor party with your beer-swilling pals) or a doughnut because a fellow employee brought a dozen to the office and everyone else is having one (besides, they’re from Krispy Kreme. Something very similar to this actually happened, thus the inspiration for this column. Thanks, Monica.)

♦ The social flyer — Someone who otherwise has a fear of flying but will do so if everyone else in the group they’re traveling with is flying, because they don’t want to hold back the others. (The only person known have immunity to being a social flyer is John Madden, who ventured from one Sunday to another to announce NFL games in a bus — the Madden Cruiser — where he could swill beer to his heart’s content if he so desired because someone else was driving.)

♦ The social human being — Who will pretend to enjoy the comfort of other human beings to create a false persona, despite the fact that they hate almost everyone. (It is rumored that Ron DeSantis is a social human. According to the book “Swamp Monsters” by Matt Dixon, the Florida governor “has a social circle that could fit in the back seat of a Mini Cooper” and “is not a man of many chums.” In other words, given his position as the leader of a state of more than 21 million residents, he is the perfect role model for anyone aspiring to become a social human.

♦ The social sports enthusiast — Who if everyone else in their posse — all of whom are true sports fans — is talking about a recent college football upset, coach being fired, or player entering the transfer portal, will periodically interject (“no kidding,” “unbelievable,” “go figure”) as if they know something about the subject at hand … when the truth is they are practically clueless.

(I had a friend who was a social sports enthusiast. I’ll call him Bruce. Another friend and I — both true sports fanatics — would talk sports at lunchtime during work, and Bruce would always put his two cents in, even though it was obvious he had no clue what we were talking about. That being said, we invented a player — Buzzy Rosenthal — who played linebacker for USC. When Buzzy’s name came up at the lunch table, Bruce always made a comment or two suggesting he knew what we were talking about … even though we were making everything up. Incidentally, that was more than 40 years ago. Today Buzzy is the defensive backs coach for the Tennessee Titans. Just ask Bruce.)

No doubt, there are many other types of people who will do something out of their comfort zone simply to fit in. Here’s one more example: someone who is deathly afraid of scary movies but will go to the theater to see one — if all of their friends are going. (Social white knucklers. Look it up.)

There is a composite name for all of the many varieties of socially-adaptive people in the world, like the social butterfly. This is a person who can seamlessly flit from one group to another, even though they have absolutely no real interest or knowledge of what the group is actually all about.

The social butterfly has to be willing to live by the phrase grin and bear it. In other words, they have to accept unpleasant or undesirable things without complaining — so they can fit in as part of the gang.

A good example: I have a couple of friends living in the Sunshine State who aren’t exactly enamored that their governor suspended his presidential campaign — not because they wanted to see him in the Oval Office, but because he’s no longer out on the campaign trail. Now he’ll be returning to govern the state full-time.

In other words, they’ll have to grin and bear Ron DeSantis. I guess that makes them social Floridians.