T GAMBLE: Fond memories come from Christmas tree cutting

It is almost Christmas time again and time again to get the Christmas tree. Some folks have had their tree up for weeks. We, on the other hand, are just now getting our Halloween decorations down.

I suppose we should get the tree very soon or go out of town the week of Christmas. One or the other. You cannot be a self-respecting adult in the Southern United States and fail to put up a Christmas tree. I’d rather admit to selling secrets to Iran than admit I did not put up a tree.

People may forgive you for throwing up at the New Year’s party, or embezzling a little money from the work place, but they will not forgive, nor forget, if you do not put up a tree.

Once upon a time, it was an adventure to get the Christmas tree. No person of any standing in the community would dare buy a Christmas tree. One must go in the woods and cut down a fresh tree from the forests. This whole process served to bond families and create lasting family memories. It mostly served to start big arguments between Mama and Daddy as to what qualified as a suitable tree, but I guess that is still a Christmas memory.

The art to cutting your own tree in the woods revolves around figuring out which side of the tree to face the wall after you bring it home. In the history of cut your own from the woods Christmas tree harvesting there has never been a tree taken home that did not have a hole at some spot on the tree. The hole must be placed to the wall so nobody can see you have a tree that looks like somebody shot it with a howitzer.

Normally, however, there was more than one hole, and so, the family could argue for a few hours about which hole to aim toward the wall. Then, the Mama could blame the Father for cutting a tree with a hole in it as if the other 10,000 cedar trees in the woods had no holes, were perfect, if only they had been cut instead of this dog.

But, like the Charlie Brown Christmas, the family would then decorate the holy (holey) tree. Everyone would then gather round and exclaim: “By golly, that tree doesn’t look too bad after all. I think we picked a fine tree after all.” Pictures for posterity would then be taken by the dozens and a good time had by all.

Years later everyone looks at the Christmas pictures with fond memories, the trip in the woods, the struggle to hide the hole, and all the rest. And then its time again to get a tree for the next Christmas. Well, it may be a fond memory, but we are going to buy one this year.

I ain’t putting something up in my house that looks like that picture. Oh no. Christmas tree farm here come the Gambles.

Email T Gamble at [email protected].